Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
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