so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
