When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize