You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Randomize