fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Randomize
