will power is for people who don't want to get laid
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Found the puke drawer
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
