whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
50% drunk capacity currently
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
