is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
