I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
