I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
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