Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
