I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
