Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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