hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
