yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
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