Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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