Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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