My hair reeks of homosexuality.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
