it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
