I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
