If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize