i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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