this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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