oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
