My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Randomize
