Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
