Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
