TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
