my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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