I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize