of course. lets lasso hookers.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
