we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
