I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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