Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
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