As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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