Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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