what if every blade of grass was a penis?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
My ass is underappreciated
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
