Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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