Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
