So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
