i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
