I molested 6 butterflies tonight
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize