can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
North Korea, Best Korea!
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Randomize