i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Quick, to the slutcave!
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Lo siento on account of my penis...
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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