GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
