I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
