Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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