For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
third nipple confirmed
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize
