If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
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