Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize